"I carry your heart, I carry you in my heart"
Good morning. You all should still be sleeping... I'm 6 hours ahead of most of you. And I've been up since 5am... so 11pm your time. I haven't been sleeping well at all the last few nights. I think it's a combination of the malaria pills and the fact that I have way too much on my mind. The last few days have been pretty depressing, to say the least.
At the hospital yesterday, I thought little Nothando was going to die in my arms. She is struggling so much... I don't know how much longer she can fight. I rode with Pauline there, but was not able to leave her after just an hour... so I stayed for another 4 hours, and Dr. Karl drove me home after he got off work. (He works at that hospital, Coronation.) I felt slightly better leaving then, because Corine (the director here) had brought Nothando's mother to the hospital, in case it was her last few moments. This brought on a whole other string of emotions. And, since Karl was driving, we took a short cut that I had never been on before... Right through the squatter camps, with shacks and garbage all over the place. Although, after a few minutes, we were right back among the 2 and 3 story houses. My heart has never been heavier.
When we arrived back at Sparrow, I had to go outside to be alone and cry because there were kids inside my dome, and I couldn't let them see me like that. Soon I had to go help some kids with a school project, so I went into the "clusters" where the kids live and play. Well, no matter how sad I was, it didn't take long before I was smiling and laughing with the kids-- playing hopscotch and basketball (I taught the guys how to play HORSE!) There is this constant conflict between hope and despair battling inside of me... and inside this village. Although, I stand more amazed each day at just how strong the human spirit is.
At the hospital yesterday, I thought little Nothando was going to die in my arms. She is struggling so much... I don't know how much longer she can fight. I rode with Pauline there, but was not able to leave her after just an hour... so I stayed for another 4 hours, and Dr. Karl drove me home after he got off work. (He works at that hospital, Coronation.) I felt slightly better leaving then, because Corine (the director here) had brought Nothando's mother to the hospital, in case it was her last few moments. This brought on a whole other string of emotions. And, since Karl was driving, we took a short cut that I had never been on before... Right through the squatter camps, with shacks and garbage all over the place. Although, after a few minutes, we were right back among the 2 and 3 story houses. My heart has never been heavier.
When we arrived back at Sparrow, I had to go outside to be alone and cry because there were kids inside my dome, and I couldn't let them see me like that. Soon I had to go help some kids with a school project, so I went into the "clusters" where the kids live and play. Well, no matter how sad I was, it didn't take long before I was smiling and laughing with the kids-- playing hopscotch and basketball (I taught the guys how to play HORSE!) There is this constant conflict between hope and despair battling inside of me... and inside this village. Although, I stand more amazed each day at just how strong the human spirit is.
posted by Stacy at 11:29 PM
1 Comments:
That constant conflict between hope and despair is so real. How do these children continue to live with such hurt, playing and laughing? What a picture of real life that is. One more thing..... Stacy Leigh Beery....YOU taught the kids to play horse?? I am SO proud of you...!
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